i have been quiet for a while on my sea stories. There are numerous reasons/excuses, but i’m 81 and working on what i want to do for the rest of my life. One thing i will continue to do is write. So, let’s get to it.

In the late spring of 1974, Commander George Phelps soon would be relieved in a change of command ceremony aboard the USS Hollister (DD 788) in Long Beach. The outgoing captain, XO, and department heads considered what the options were if it rained. The weapons officer suggested that we move the ceremony from the 01 deck (with attendees in folding chairs on the pier) to the reserve armory about 3/4 of a mile away. The captain asked how were we going to get the crew there.

The weapons officer replied, “We’ll march the crew there, sir.”

At that, the captain, the XO, the Ops officer, and yours truly, the chief engineer, fell out of our chairs laughing at the idea of such a debacle.

The discussion reminded me of a story from one of my best golfing buddies, Marty Linville. Marty, an Army major who was awarded the Silver Star for his actions as an artillery officer in Viet Nam, was stationed at the Naval Amphibious School primarily as the director of the Navy’s gunfire support range on San Clemente Island.

During a rare command personnel inspection, Marty was in charge of the gunfire support personnel. He was having them take position for the inspection as was about to give them the command “dress right, dress,” but had second thoughts. He called his master chief petty officer to the front to consult.

“Master Chief, what should I expect if i order the troops to “dress right dress?”

Without hesitation, the master chief replied, “Chaos, sir; absolute chaos.”