Well, it’s been a while and i need a good rant. So this is for marketeers and the PR experts, those folks who sell a product or cause to just about the entire world, or rather they try to do that.

Folks, i thought you might want to know you ain’t getting to me. In fact, your efforts to sell something nearly always has the reverse effect on me.

i’m sure this will make absolutely no impact on the marketing/PR folks as i am not statistically relevant. i find that very assuring, sort of like having a life and not being a number.

For example, Maureen and i enjoy watching professional golf. Some brilliant marketeer sold the golf media folks, “Playing Through” was a neat and new idea that would sell a lot of product. So while i’m watching golfers play golf, over half the screen becomes a commericial, complete with sound. The golf picture is then so small, i have no idea of what is happening on the course, the golf course. Well, i make a note of all the companies in the commercials and vow never to buy any of their products again.

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And for all of you who must know more than me about selling prescription drugs. i hope you are getting to some docs because you are turning me off. i rely on my doctor to prescribe what i need (oh sorry, the insurance folks now want me to call him primary care). Since i had to have a VA primary care doc to make myself available for the VA services, i now have two. i know which one is my primary doc, but you see, civilians, the veteran administration, and Navy medical are not allowed to talk to each other so i have to double or triple up on my communication. i’m pretty sure it has something to do with money.

But back to these prescription ads. They generally make me nauseous, if not ill. And if you might actually make me think about your ad, that qualifying stuff — i’m sure included to avoid law suits from ambulance chasers — at the end of each commercial snuffs out any attraction your ad might have.

And every time when i see one of those commercials after i turn the sound to mute, i wonder how much money was added to the cost of the prescription.

And who the hell are these folks you have on your commerical…and how much are you paying them to push your product? i can’t imagine anyone afflicted with what your product will supposedly cure would actually try to get your product with all the bad things could happen you reveal at the end.

And once again, if i do have a choice in what prescription i will take it won’t be any i’ve seen or heard or read on these ads.

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And i would be much happier, if all of you folks selling stuff, would just tell me about your product or service, not how bad all the others are, not making me laugh and think it will make me buy it. Or have beautiful people that have no resemblance to me to buy your ad. And i’m damn sure i’m not going to buy it if an admired athlete or movie star is pushing it.

Once upon a time i was a a business development manager for a military contractor. A former employee who had been in my position asked a friend and fellow employee if we were “still selling smoke.” Sadly the answer was yes.

And it seems nearly every product or service is selling smoke. i guess those statistics these folks use in which i’m not relevant it sells their products. Not to me. Sorry. Oh, i enjoy some of the commercials when i fail to mute them or fail to record the program and fast forward through things that make all the sports i watch at least an hour longer than they should be. Some are funny. Some are touching. Some are interesting. But i ain’t buying. Sorry.

Now if you want to add a little box at the bottom of the screen that tells me you are the sponsor and what product or service you have and an objective point as to what it is, and let me watch whatever i’m watching, or listening, or in the case of the internet, reading, then you might have a chance with me.

But i know. i know that isn’t going to happen.

It is sometimes really enjoyable being a grumpy old ranting man who is irrelevant.